Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
It all comes back to one day.
The day I moved out of my parent’s house on April 1st, 2014.
With that decision the trajectory of my life changed and I began the journey to becoming a man.
What has changed since I’ve moved out?
Everything. I am a different person. There is no comparison to the old me.
Since moving out I have:
- Lost my virginity
- Become self-reliant
- Followed my heart and intuition
- Become motivated and hungry for success
When I lived with my parents I had no desire to do anything. I lived a life full of doubt, insecurity, anxiety, and fear.
I stayed at home and played video games in my free time instead of doing something worthwhile.
Moving Out Gave Me Leverage
The moment I moved out I had leverage for the first time.
When I lived at home I had a comfortable existence and had a full belly thanks to my mom’s cooking. My weekly routine included: lifting weights, serving tables, going to class, and playing video games. Although I wasn’t having sex, I had other things to fill the void.
Life was comfortable.
However, that comfort was short-lived.
On December 19, 2013, I walked across the stage in front of a crowded auditorium. I shook the Dean’s hand and received my diploma. As I went to take my seat, I knew I had some tough decisions to make going forward.
I had no plan for the future and I knew I had to get my act together.
The Tipping Point
Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change.
Life continued after I graduated. Nothing changed except that I no longer had to attend class. I replaced that time with more video games.
But, something gnawed at me on the inside. I knew I couldn’t go on like this forever.
In February, it hit me. I realized that my life wasn’t going to improve unless I did something to change it. I asked myself a few questions that day:
How long am I going to live like this? To settle for a life of fear and insecurity? I’ve never had an intimate connection with a girl. I’m at home playing video games. I have no ambitions. When am I going to cut the cord and stop living in fear?
That was the tipping point. The pain of staying the same had become greater than the pain of change. I knew that by staying at home, I would remain shackled to old behaviors I resented.
My only option was to move out.
What Happened Next Surprised Me
I thought that by moving out my life would magically get better. That I would turn into a sex god. Find my dream job. And live happily ever after.
After eight months of living by myself, I had settled into a routine once again. Although my life had taken a turn for the better…something was still holding me back.
It was my job. My home-away-from-home. The place I had worked at since I was 16.
It was at that point that I knew I must quit. It was the only way that I was going to attain the leverage I needed. Or else I was going to be serving tables for the rest of my life.
But, what was I going to do? I was a misfit in the corporate world and knew I never wanted a 9-5. I was scared of this happening:
The clearest picture of the empty life is the suburban man, who gets up at the same hour every weekday morning, takes the same train to work in the city, performs the same task in the office, lunches at the same place, leaves the same tip for the waitress each day, comes home on the same train each night, has 2.3 children, cultivates a little garden, spends a two-week vacation at the shore every summer which he does not enjoy, goes to church every Christmas and Easter, and moves through a routine, mechanical existence year after year until he finally retires at sixty-five and very soon thereafter dies of heart failure, possibly brought on by repressed hostility. I have always had the secret suspicion, however, that he dies of boredom.
I had four months remaining on my lease and decided on that day that I would take a commission sales job and take a leap of faith.
On March 20, 2015, I worked my last day as a server and said goodbye to everyone.
Ten days later, I packed the car with my possessions and hit the road for Austin, Texas.
Taking the Call to Adventure
It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life and in change there is power.
There comes a point in every man’s life when the call to adventure comes knocking.
One of two things happens. He takes the call to adventure and embraces a life of the unknown. Or, he ignores the call and lives in regret for the rest of his life wondering what if.
In life, opportunity is fleeting. If you’re not ready when your number is called you may never get the chance again.
Besides, do you really want to suffocate your dreams and your heart’s calling in exchange for “comfort” and “security”?
Living at home, playing video games, watching TV, working at a corporation performing the same mundane tasks every day.
What’s your life going to look like in 10 years doing that?
Following your heart is the only real option you’ve got. It leads to something that can’t be attained any other way a resilient character and the ability to walk through the world with ease knowing that you’ve conquered your fear.
It’s the scariest thing you’ll ever do. But it’s also the most invigorating.